Change is not good...

I decided to change my blog layout to make it pretty and less white and boring and what happens? It is pretty but I lost all my fancy lists that help me know what is going on with my friends and family and that was the best feature ever! *Whine* So, I will fix this but this is also why I am so behind on reading. Blah to that.

Vegas was a fun filled trip with lots of sleeping and sore legs. Walking should not be that painful but you want to look cute because you are in Vegas so uncomfortable shoes right? We went to see the Blue Man Group. Strange but so cool. All I could think the whole show was "God Bless America!" These men put together something so weird and cool and they make money doing it. It's awesome. I need to find something like that, something I love and can be at least supported doing. I have ideas. I will let you know if they ever come to fruition.

We went on the dam tour at Hoover dam. We were late for the tour of the whole dam so we got to see the power plant it was pretty cool. Our friends who went with us, she got really sick the first day and they went home so we are seriously lacking in pictures because when you just have two it's hard to get pictures. Anyway, I need to clean because our social worker from LDS social services is coming on Tuesday and I need to be prepared. I hate to clean it's just so ongoing and never ending you know? It's really not that bad but I am lazy from vacation and laundry, I think laundry is the worst. I also need to figure out what I want to make for dinner and get away from the computer.

Recap:
Too much computer
No idea what to make for dinner
Vegas is cool and so is the dam
Ideas for making money
cannot keep up because all blogs are not in a neat space, will be fixed soon.
MUST CLEAN!
Bye.

Evidence...

Of warmth on the way!



Our first signs of spring in our yard. I also have some lovely large and green tulip leaves popping up and I am so excited!





And a little striped guy just to keep things interesting.

Random thoughts...

1. I am seeking a creative outlet again. Maybe I need to take up the picture project again. I would like to get a new camera that was cooler and better than mine but I am too lazy to figure out all of the settings and junk. I just need someone to show me how to do it, you can tell me and all I hear is the teacher from Charlie Brown movies. I wish I had time to set up photo shoots, I keep having such, what I think are fun ideas. I need to find a band and take pictures for their CD's.

2. I am really hopeful this month. I really hope it's my month and if it's not I know it's coming soon. It would be amazing if it was this soon though. Wouldn't that be amazing? Let me answer for you, it would be amazing.

3. My winking cat salt and pepper shakers make me so happy.
I saw them at a store in town and knew instantly they had to be mine. Seriously, aren't they the best? I think I shall call them Ozzie and Isabelle

4. I am so completely excited for Spring! I remember being a little girl and loving spring. It was not popular or maybe it was too popular so I felt like a follower but Spring is my favorite. Not only is it time for my birthday which more and more is not so cool, but I just love the thought of rebirth and starting over fresh. I love flowers and baby bunnies and warmth and Easter. And Orange Blossoms! Oh my gosh the Orange Blossoms. I miss them soooooo very much. I guess I just feel very positive about what is coming. Plus I have the coolest bunnies evar!

They make me very happy too.

5. I finally took down my pine cone wreath, I guess March 6th is as good a time as any. I say this as I am pondering getting more wood to start a fire. Did I mention warmth is on the way, I hope soon?

6. I bought Ballet pointe shoes on ebay. It's my practical side coming out. O_o Jason thinks I am crazy but I am just thinking it would be fun. What little girl didn't want to strap on a pair of those baby's and give it a try? I want to dye them red or Bright blue or Teal or Purple or fushia. Something fun, I am not sure of all the ins and outs of dying ballet shoes though. So maybe photoshop will have to do the Dying for me.


7. We need a new couch. Wow, are they expensive or what?

8. Freezing wind is the pitts.

9. That is all.

Thank you to all...

I used to think when people said they could feel your prayers and love they were exaggerating. I don't think that anymore. I am so thankful for your love and prayers. Really thank you so much for thinking and fasting for us. It means more than you could ever know, and it helps remind me of what the most important things in life are. Family and good friends.

Today I had sharing time, it was on Fathers. I feel like fathers kind of get a bum rap in our society. We don't like the ones who are bums but we also don't really go out of our way to recognize the great ones, and although, my dad will probably never read this. I just thought I would like to give him a shout out for being awesome. Sure he's not perfect, but he is there, I have never once wondered if he loved me, he has never had a problem telling us how much he loves us. I would watch, and still do, TV shows that talk about the dad who could never say I love you. I think I always took for granted that my father never had that problem. I am thankful that he is worthy of the priesthood. I am thankful that he still takes care of me. Helping me with car issues or by letting my mom come and be with me when I need her. I am thankful for the wonderful example he has been to me throughout my life and continues to be. What a blessing to have a dad who loves you and continues to bless you even when you are far away.
Thanks Dad, I love you very much.

Next week, if I haven't been released is on Mothers, I am sure I will be as emotional then too. :)

They say not to get your hair cut when you are emotional, May I also suggest not cutting your own hair when you are emotional? I think it's way worse. I went to trim my, well, we will call them bangs, they were past my nose. I thought I would just take a little off so they weren't so scraggly. I bought a razor for cutting hair took a swipe and yipes! I have bangs. Although not as short as Audrey's



They came out pretty short. They are growing on me, literally and figuratively. I am wondering what it would look like to cut them even shorter. Just embrace the whole vintage aesthetic.



Anyway don't do it by yourself, it's not a good idea. Consider yourself warned.

Sharing is Caring...

I have debated sharing this. Mostly because I don't want to be a crying wack-a-doo for the rest of my life, but life is about sharing the journey right? We aren't supposed to go it alone, we need each other. That is what life is all about. I have been listening to a few talks by Elder Holland over and over and over and they have really helped me during the last few months and especially last week. He says that God wants us to be strong as well as good. We can't control everything and those moments are for our growth. I know God wants me to be strong.

Last Monday night I found out I was pregnant. Tuesday morning it was confirmed again. I got my doctors appointment set for Friday after work and I had lost the baby by Thursday. Luckily my mom came up Thursday night. Jason had gone hunting Thursday morning. The doctor sent me to the hospital to get blood work done and to make sure it wasn't ectopic. I ended up getting sonograms and poked and prodded only to be told what I already knew. I had lost the baby very early on. As heart breaking and horrible this has been I am very lucky. I am very blessed that I lost it so early. I can't imagine loosing a baby further along. I don't know how I would handle that. I am also blessed because now it appears that there is a possibility of me actually getting pregnant, and as much as I had hoped it would stick I do know the Lord is looking out for me and eventually I am going to be blessed. Jason came home from his hunt early, Friday night late, I am very blessed to have such a loving and supportive husband.

Jason gave me a blessing last night. I was told I would have a family soon, that the Lord wants me to be strong and that I need to focus on my blessings. I had already restarted a gratitude journal, I was already on the right track. The key is going to be staying positive and hopeful while I wait. I am not sure how my family is coming but I am glad they are.

Rather than retreat and try to pretend this painful event didn't happen I come to you asking for your help. Please remember us in your prayers. We appreciate them and feel them help us. Also, my family is going to have a special fast for us on Sunday, if you would like to join us I would be very grateful. I am sorry I haven't been answering my phone much lately, I am getting better. It's just been hard to talk to people. I hope you will forgive me. :)

Thank you all for your love and support it means so very much. I love you all!

"Hope is critical to both faith and charity. When disobedience, disappointment, and procrastination erode faith, hope is there to uphold our faith. When frustration and impatience challenge charity, hope braces our resolve and urges us to care for our fellowmen even without expectation of reward. The brighter our hope, the greater our faith. The stronger our hope, the purer our charity."
--Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "The Infinite Power of Hope", Ensign, Nov 2008, 21–24

This makes me happy

Oh how I wish I could find someone to teach me how to play the uke better.

The highlight of my super bowl experience..

This pretty much sums up my time at a certain insurance company and well...pretty much most of my life. I am the lady wishing she were somewhere else, I honestly think I have had that actual daydream on several occasions, just with cuter shoes. Well and it's a given with the cry every time, cuz that's just how I roll! :)