I feel very open and raw and I think I don't like feeling that visible and vulnerable. I wonder if I am supposed to learn how to function in this state. I would rather be closed off and hidden and blend into the background at this time. I don't know that I will ever feel comfortable or OK with being open and raw, but maybe I will learn to function better in that state.
I wish we knew anything.
We bought a couch. Now to get it all the way home with the dogs and all of our other junk. Not to mention the trundle bed we picked up for our friends. I don't want to go home, I am home. Can we just stay?
Hubby was right, this week was going to be hard because of not knowing anything, not hearing anything, not being communicated with. So many things in my life are so shadowed and vague, and I am sick to death of it. Maybe that is why I need to learn to live on the open raw side of life. God is shoving me out of my comfort zone. Growth. It's like I know I need it, but yeah...
5 comments:
Sorry to hear it didn't go as well as hoped. I hope you hear some good news soon.
i do wish at times like these you could be near your family more. you'll be able to stay at some point. but i like that even though you're not diggin it your still very trusting in god of the circumstances which surround you. like you said maybe theres something you need to be there for and need to be wide open for. love ya kell :)
You are in my prayers. I hope you are able to hear something soon too. I so wish we could have gotten together. Next time...
My recent challenges have left me with many of your same feelings. I too wish to be able to hide away until things feel more normal. But alas, we keep going.
Hang in there! Love you!!
Kell you are an awesome gal. I think in the end this will be a small part of an amazing story. I've been thinking about you lots and was wondering what was happening in the life of Kelly. Stay strong girlfriend! I hope the best for you! XOXO
We all love you Kell, you are an awesome girl, and an inspiration of faith in my life. It would definitely be nice to be able to hide our head in the sand during times of trial, I would be buried right next to you, but like you said, we must grow, like it or not. Someone in our testimony meeting today had a great quote, I wish I could find it to quote, but it was something like "we were taught and prepared for our trials on this earth" I like that, at least it doesn't seem like such a surprise and something that is happening to us. It is happening for us. I do pray for it to end for you though, a girl can only take so much. We think about you all of the time. xoxo
Post a Comment