Back off!
Love,
Me
Love,
Me
As much as I had hoped to write a nice post about how I was going to work really hard to live a life full of gratitude and giving myself permission to truly be myself and love every minute of it, it doesn't seem to be heading in that direction. I wanted to talk about how much I wanted to revel in every minute of motherhood. Especially before there are more, because I have heard it's hard to keep sane at that point. I wanted to do at least a picture of the week. I wanted to create and play my uke and really commit myself to being a better me.
Let's sum up what has actually happened shall we?
Day one, our dog tried to jump a fence and ripped his claw out of his paw. We tried to wrap it up but he limped more with the bandage than he did without. We packed up our stuff.
Day two: We loaded up our dogs and our junk and our baby and headed to our new home. I was singing banjo music as we pulled away, feeling like the Clampets all the way. Just needed Grandma out there on the roof in a rocking chair. Later dueling banjos came on my awesome pandora station and that made me happy. I later would flush my dad's car keys down Grandma's toilet. Luckily avoiding destroying her septic system. They were fished out by J and my Brother in Law who will never, ever, let me live it down. I screamed. I almost cried. Fun times.
Day three: Mostly just unpacking and trying to find places to put things, oh, and laundry. Laundry makes any day a bad day.
Day Four: Doubled over in pain from who knows what crying.
Day five: The boy grabs and tries to eat a scorpion. Jason saves him, but scares him to death in the process. He had to shake his had rigorously to make him drop it. We squished it three times but those crazy things just wont' squish. Finally he stopped twitching. I think he said with his last breath that he was sending an army of his brothers to avenge his death. I am pretty sure that is how scorpions work. So now I am totally paranoid, especially with the baby. Alarm on phone goes off, oh yeah, I have an appointment to get my shot in Tucson. Yay! This is the second shot in a series of three. Apparently I have to be on birth control in order to get pregnant. Don't ask me these people don't talk to me or let me know what is going on ever.
Day six: Drive to Tucson, find out they don't have the shot. (This happened last time too.) Tell me I just have to come back next week. That will be $25 co pay please. They keep asking me if I brought the medicine. Last I checked, you need a prescription to get medicine. I didn't know I could just waltz into a pharmacy and pick it up OR ELSE I WOULD HAVE! So I get go back next week. I go out side stop myself from crying because, have I mentioned, I am on birth control and it makes me the crazy crying lady of doom? Well it does, I am sure to make tons of friends in my new digs *rolls eyes*. I go back in and ask if I need a prescription or something. So and so is going to look into it. That's nice. I am not feeling hopeful at this point. So and so has been supposed to look into it like a month ago you know. I guess I will just jump in my car and wait anxiously for the next adventure to Tucson. I hate driving to Tucson.
Holding back tears I get in my car and the car alarm starts going off. Well the little key clicker thing doesn't work so some guy comes and tells me to use the clicker. Yeah dude, it's never worked and I am pretty sure it doesn't work after the toilet incident. Thanks for the tip though. I can't get the alarm to go off so I figure I will drive away. It has to stop once you are rolling away in it, right? Wrong. So I am driving on the street and cars are slowing way down and looking all around. I pulled into another parking lot. I called J and burst into tears. He is telling me to go back to the Dr's office and tell them I am not leaving until I get a shot. I tell him I cannot deal with this right now. I call my dad, I try to pull the fuse, no go. I look under the hood. Dad is telling me to look for something that doesn't belong and pull the wire. That's like telling me to defuse a bomb. I don't think you want me in there just pulling wires higgelty piggelty. So I think I know what it is, but all I can really deduce is it's on the driver side and my ears no longer want to hear things. So I drive the car to this car place. Praying it won't start blaring, it doesn't, it just keeps beeping at me. Dude at car place sends me to another place that sells car alarms. He tells me to talk to Paul. I talk to Paul, he comes out and kills the alarm. Thanks Paul. I go to Target and walk around to wind down and get ready for the 2.5 hour drive home. I can't wait to do this again next week. *bashes head into steering wheel*
I get some food at Ghetto fabulous A&W. Some kid in the back is walking around muttering to himself and the lady taking my order is really hard to hear and annoyed at me for asking her to repeat herself. Look lady I have been standing in front of a blaringly loud car alarm for a while now, give me a break and stop mumbling and tell the weird kid to stop talking to himself. I eat my food and get home. J took me to get a blizzard.
So in an effort to live a more grateful life. I would like to give a shout out to Ryan and Paul for helping a gal in the throws of an emotional breakdown. Paul didn't even charge me for it. Thanks Paul! Thanks J for the blizzard. It was needed. And thank you Cindy for watching the boy. I don't even want to know how horrible life would've been with him crying AND the car alarm never ceasing. I may have just driven into a wall. I am grateful I didn't. :)
And 2011 this is for you! I think Helen may be on to something here.
I was going to write a post about how this picture was a wonderful example of how you could disagree with Christmas and still be festive, but now I just dedicate it to you 2011 and give you a warning. You better back off dude, I am on birth control and I just may snap, or cry, or cry AND snap, and you don't want that. *stern preschool teacher eyes*
Let's sum up what has actually happened shall we?
Day one, our dog tried to jump a fence and ripped his claw out of his paw. We tried to wrap it up but he limped more with the bandage than he did without. We packed up our stuff.
Day two: We loaded up our dogs and our junk and our baby and headed to our new home. I was singing banjo music as we pulled away, feeling like the Clampets all the way. Just needed Grandma out there on the roof in a rocking chair. Later dueling banjos came on my awesome pandora station and that made me happy. I later would flush my dad's car keys down Grandma's toilet. Luckily avoiding destroying her septic system. They were fished out by J and my Brother in Law who will never, ever, let me live it down. I screamed. I almost cried. Fun times.
Day three: Mostly just unpacking and trying to find places to put things, oh, and laundry. Laundry makes any day a bad day.
Day Four: Doubled over in pain from who knows what crying.
Day five: The boy grabs and tries to eat a scorpion. Jason saves him, but scares him to death in the process. He had to shake his had rigorously to make him drop it. We squished it three times but those crazy things just wont' squish. Finally he stopped twitching. I think he said with his last breath that he was sending an army of his brothers to avenge his death. I am pretty sure that is how scorpions work. So now I am totally paranoid, especially with the baby. Alarm on phone goes off, oh yeah, I have an appointment to get my shot in Tucson. Yay! This is the second shot in a series of three. Apparently I have to be on birth control in order to get pregnant. Don't ask me these people don't talk to me or let me know what is going on ever.
Day six: Drive to Tucson, find out they don't have the shot. (This happened last time too.) Tell me I just have to come back next week. That will be $25 co pay please. They keep asking me if I brought the medicine. Last I checked, you need a prescription to get medicine. I didn't know I could just waltz into a pharmacy and pick it up OR ELSE I WOULD HAVE! So I get go back next week. I go out side stop myself from crying because, have I mentioned, I am on birth control and it makes me the crazy crying lady of doom? Well it does, I am sure to make tons of friends in my new digs *rolls eyes*. I go back in and ask if I need a prescription or something. So and so is going to look into it. That's nice. I am not feeling hopeful at this point. So and so has been supposed to look into it like a month ago you know. I guess I will just jump in my car and wait anxiously for the next adventure to Tucson. I hate driving to Tucson.
Holding back tears I get in my car and the car alarm starts going off. Well the little key clicker thing doesn't work so some guy comes and tells me to use the clicker. Yeah dude, it's never worked and I am pretty sure it doesn't work after the toilet incident. Thanks for the tip though. I can't get the alarm to go off so I figure I will drive away. It has to stop once you are rolling away in it, right? Wrong. So I am driving on the street and cars are slowing way down and looking all around. I pulled into another parking lot. I called J and burst into tears. He is telling me to go back to the Dr's office and tell them I am not leaving until I get a shot. I tell him I cannot deal with this right now. I call my dad, I try to pull the fuse, no go. I look under the hood. Dad is telling me to look for something that doesn't belong and pull the wire. That's like telling me to defuse a bomb. I don't think you want me in there just pulling wires higgelty piggelty. So I think I know what it is, but all I can really deduce is it's on the driver side and my ears no longer want to hear things. So I drive the car to this car place. Praying it won't start blaring, it doesn't, it just keeps beeping at me. Dude at car place sends me to another place that sells car alarms. He tells me to talk to Paul. I talk to Paul, he comes out and kills the alarm. Thanks Paul. I go to Target and walk around to wind down and get ready for the 2.5 hour drive home. I can't wait to do this again next week. *bashes head into steering wheel*
I get some food at Ghetto fabulous A&W. Some kid in the back is walking around muttering to himself and the lady taking my order is really hard to hear and annoyed at me for asking her to repeat herself. Look lady I have been standing in front of a blaringly loud car alarm for a while now, give me a break and stop mumbling and tell the weird kid to stop talking to himself. I eat my food and get home. J took me to get a blizzard.
So in an effort to live a more grateful life. I would like to give a shout out to Ryan and Paul for helping a gal in the throws of an emotional breakdown. Paul didn't even charge me for it. Thanks Paul! Thanks J for the blizzard. It was needed. And thank you Cindy for watching the boy. I don't even want to know how horrible life would've been with him crying AND the car alarm never ceasing. I may have just driven into a wall. I am grateful I didn't. :)
And 2011 this is for you! I think Helen may be on to something here.
I was going to write a post about how this picture was a wonderful example of how you could disagree with Christmas and still be festive, but now I just dedicate it to you 2011 and give you a warning. You better back off dude, I am on birth control and I just may snap, or cry, or cry AND snap, and you don't want that. *stern preschool teacher eyes*
Costco had the gall to play Christmas music at Christmas time. Surely you heard about it, all of those people dying on the floors of Costco with blood leaking out of their ears. No? You didn't see that in the news? Weird, because the way these people act, that must be what is going on. Unless your head is going to explode and blood is going to shoot out of your ears I think it's time for you to put on your big girl (or boy as the case may be) panties and get over it. Costco is a privately owned business that also sells, Christmas trees, and ornaments, and *gasp* Nativity scenes. They have every right to play Christmas music, just like you have every right to be offended, you do not however, have the right to force them to stop playing the music they choose to play. Maybe you should go home and shop on-line with your non-Christmas music and give the rest of us break already. If your delicate constitution cannot handle it, maybe you should just stay in your house where you will be protected from the big bad world around you. Go ahead and do us a favor and protect yourself from the vicious, Ho ho ho, or a fa la lalalala that is just more than you can manage to deal with.
